Memoirs of A Jr Dev – Stuck 2

We have come upon the moment where I am overwhelmed and don’t have a solution. Which is scary and odd for me.
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I am still in Bootcamp, I have an awesome freaking job, I have a passion for coding and yet I often feel like I wonder if I am ever going to get good at this. Am I even smart enough to engineer software, I should have KNOWN that function was out of scope, I should have KNOWN that I didn’t define that variable so DUH error…. and many other self deprecating, self annihilating silent(but LOUD) messages that come into my brain.
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This weekend, in an attempt to work smarter and get better at what I do, I decided it was time to go Vim and Zsh.
As I watched a very well put together webcast “Pimp Your Terminal” by Wes Bos, I was excited to have my setup as awesomely efficient as my co-workers. But then….as usual, all hell broke loose. Even with Wes’s awesome instructions, my Agnoster theme was not looking right (yes I used Powerline Fonts, yes I changed settings per Stack O suggestions in iTerm2 Preferences).
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I have realised that my job, my passion and what I admittedly love to do is to solve problems. I run into a bug, I want to solve it. I have a confounding error message, I’ll get to the bottom of it. If there is one thing I am confident about, it’s that I will find the answer come hell or high water.
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And yet, when I get on a roll or I am ready to start doing my thing, I hit a hater and it feels like this.


Normally, I always offer solutions to my challenges here on COF, but today, I am at a loss.
I can phone a friend, but…I am starting to get self conscious about having my hand held WAY too often for my taste.
I played the bass for a good 4 hours but this kid will STILL outshine me. LOL


I attempted to shut my mind down for a minute like

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Didn’t work.
So here I am, a beautiful Sunday, and a list of things to do and completely stuck. Here is my stuck list, take a gander..if you have ever run into any of these “stucks” share how you got unstuck with COF.
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-nothing works, google search not providing answers, tired of going to others for help, just once want to figure it out on your own, maybe burnt out on your passion, the state of American politics is a not so funny joke, Agnoster not rendering properly in iTerm2, work notes in Evernote are completely disorganised, Okra really is not that delicious, high heels are fun in theory.

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2 thoughts on “Memoirs of A Jr Dev – Stuck

  • Sandy Nielsen

    As you know, I absolutely love reading all of your posts! This one, no exception. So honest about being stuck, a place where every human is once in a while. We can all relate, for sure. And the memes and video you find pull it all together so wonderfully!

    I will say that when I’m feeling stuck, or troubled, I try to imagine myself 6 months from now. I sort of pick a date and imagine what I’ll be doing at that time. It helps me feel better because then I can see that whatever is bothering me today will probably not be bothering me then. (I somehow overlook the fact that, certainly, that day ahead will have its own share of items to bother me about. haha!) It helps me calm myself and realize that some sort of solution or decision, action or realization, will materialize.

    I’m looking forward already to your next post!

  • Gabi Jack

    Hey there,

    Chin up! We all get stuck now and then and that doesn’t say anything about our intelligence, talents or ability to get the work done. A few things that come to mind:

    1. You don’t have to go Vim. I’ve been doing perfectly well using RubyMine and Atom for a long time. Choose the tools that you feel more comfortable with and that you know for sure will help you be productive. Your dev environment needs to be your ally, not your enemy.
    2. There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking for help… it doesn’t matter how many times. We all need help every now and then. We are not supposed to know it all. I find that sometimes all I need is someone else to talk things through with, not so much to give me THE answer, but to help me sort through my thoughts about the problem I’m facing. They may point out something I overlooked and that gives me a clue where to look or what to try next. They may not have any idea themselves but pose a question I hadn’t thought about. And, more often than not, while talking about it and about what I’ve done to figure it out, boom, the answer shows up or I get an idea. Have you tried screen hero on Slack? It’s awesome for that.
    3. It’s ok to not be able to solve a bug at some particular point in time… you will, eventually. My co-workers and I often call those bugs that we can’t reproduce or figure out why or how they happen “impossibugs”. Some of those have lingered for a while in our queue until one day someone is finally able to reproduce.
    4. It’s a process. As you learn, you’ll be able to go back to things that puzzled you before with a better understanding, the important thing is to keep moving forward and keep learning.
    5. As RJK says… it’s only code. 🙂